We are at the last stretch of a two week long October break. I've enjoyed it to the full. This is the
year of no plans so we've spent this school break at home. Luca Bo
(who has started his four year long apprenticeship to become an awesome
wood worker/carpenter/builder)
has been working most days as he no longer can benefit from school vacations.
I think he was a little bit upset when reality sunk in last week, being the
only one who needed to get up at dawn while the rest of us slept in. I'm so
beaming proud of my boy, who gets up at 5.30 am making himself a frothy coffee
and grilled cheese sandwich for breakfast. He prepares his lunch sandwiches
and get ready to leave the house an hour later to catch the bus before sun
comes up. All by himself. As a mother with a built in supervising radar, I
usually wake up about the same just to make sure he is up
(without him even knowing... I just put my "Mama elephant ears" into
practice and listen for noise from his bedroom or the kitchen and as soon as
I hear him I turn around and fall back asleep...)
and not one single time has he overslept. In fact, he has never ever missed a
school bus or been late for school in his whole life. That is more than I can
say about myself...
While Luca Bo has been working - learning how to set a tile floor, renovate a
wooden chair and build a door
(I love love LOVE that he has chosen this professional route, it is so
him!!!)
- the rest of us have had sleep in mornings and little on our agendas. As I
work at an International school as an After School Carer, I have school break
too and I've made the most of it by diving back into my crochet hobby. I've
spent lots of time making slow but satisfying progress on my, for the moment,
three WiP's:
• The Blanket Of Hope to stay sane
• The Cluster V-stitch baby blanket for unknown baby
• Some Thermal stitch potholders for my home
The weekend gave us fabulous autumn weather with crisp fresh air and sunshine.
I decided to tidy up the shed, which was a complete disaster... Some of you
might have seen it on my Instagram @myrosevalley. It was one of those
spontaneous projects that you start on a whim with great enthusiasm and after
10 minutes you ask yourself: "Why on earth did I start this???" I stuck
it through, dragged everything out, swept the floor, cleaned up all the mice
poop, spider webs and dead bugs. Sorted, cleaned and re-arranged. I put up a
number of big nails on the wooden walls to hang things. When all was done I
was so chuffed with the result that I had to show it to every family member
and get praised for my efforts (like a child... I know...)
"Oh Mama, you've done so well. It looks great. Bravo!!!" Bless my
children for knowing I need praise just as much as they do.
On Sunday Jay and I took a long walk chatting about future plans. As a couple
in our early 50's and with only teenagers in the house nowadays
(how did that happen?), things are changing dramatically for us all and
you start to think about what is coming next... Who are we? What do we want to
do? Where are we going? As much as our youngest Emmy Bo is having a
challenging time with existential thoughts in puberty, I guess we are going
through a bit of the same thing... It's all new to us and it is a bit of
challenging times. I think they call it midlife crises...
A friend once asked me:
"Annette, you - who always are in some sort of crises - can you help me
because I think I'm having a crises and I don't know how to deal with
it."
Yep, that's me. And often I've been ashamed or annoyed of being that deep
thinker, analytic person, questioning and putting to much thought into
things... It hasn't been easy, it still isn't, but it is who I am and who I've
always been. I guess you can say I've been in puberty crises, friendship
crises, being single crises, changing job crises, love crises, moving country
crises, getting married crises, becoming a mum crises, missing my home country
crises, loneliness crises, who am I crises, low self esteem crises, I'm not
good enough crises... Do you want me to go on? Crises has such a
negative sound to it though and I prefer to call all these things challenges
of life.
As we travel on this journey through life, obstacles will occur and we will
find ways to get around them. We will find solutions. And if we didn't have
these challenges that forces us to reflect upon where we are, what we are
doing and what we really want, how on earth would we be able to grow and dare
to open doors to new exciting paths that might, or might not, lead us to new
places, people and personal growth? I'm not saying that it is at all easy, but
I do believe we sometimes have to stop and reflect on which path to take
next.
So anyway, we went on this beautiful afternoon walk up the mountain above our
house and chatted lightly about this next phase in life. "The middle aged
couple with grown up kids" phase. What does that mean? I'm not sure. I can
recall so many people telling me throughout the years to really enjoy and
cherish the time I have with the kids because one day they will be big and
wanting to leave the nest... And I guess I always knew that, of course, but
even if I did it has kind of sneaked up on me. It feels like it has all
happened so suddenly. I just didn't really see
(with emphasis on that word "see"...) it coming. Now I am the one
saying the same thing to other mothers with young children. So bizarre... Time
passes so quickly without you even noticing. Today is coming to an end already
and a new day is to arise... and so life goes on. Somehow it feels like time
is passing quicker and quicker the older I get. Do you feel the same way?
At the end of the weekend I packed up my crochet, put away all my "bench time
props" and closed the now tidy and organized shed. It really was an awesome,
productive and relaxed weekend and although this week has been a bit hectic so
far, I'm still making the most out of my "staycation", focusing on what I want
to do instead of what I should do. And who knows... maybe this "staycation"
will continue for a while... I suspect a new lock down might soon be
reality... Corona is not giving in... quite the opposite.
Take care my lovelies. Stay safe. But live. Don't forget to make the most of
every day you have on this planet. And if that is making big changes, taking
action on projects or just chilling with crochet, you decide.
Kärlek
Annette
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